I like to end the week on a reflective note. It gives me the chance to think back on the past week, ruminate on what I would do differently, celebrate successes, and prepare for the weekend and new week to come. Sometimes I set forth goals for myself, or mantras to focus on. For me, this past week (and really the last two and a half years) have been about change. About seeing the world differently, about experiencing things from a new viewpoint, about delving into who I am and what I want from life. Becoming a mom changed me in so many ways and continues to force me to grow and learn and explore and reinvent. I feel like I am finally starting to become a woman (soooo cliche, I know) but I really feel like I am starting to come into my own so to speak and with that brings a whole new set of values, of outlooks, of needs and wants. The things that I thought were important in my early 20’s are so vastly different from the things I value today. I am learning that I have to put myself first, that I can not always put the needs of others above my own, and that having needs or being vulnerable is ok, and NORMAL. I am learning that while being fiercely independent can be a good thing, it can also limit the ability of those around you from being able to offer their support or love. I am learning how important it is to reach out to others not only to lend them support but to ask for it from them as well. Life is a balancing act, and I have never been good at balance, but I am learning. And learning is progress, it is movement. I believe that as long as there is momentum, as long as we are pushing forward and growing, then we are succeeding and moving towards something bigger and better. I am trying not to get caught up in the outcomes or the future but instead to focus on the present, to live in the now instead of the what-ifs, to use every day as an opportunity to learn. As John Green wrote in ‘Looking For Alaska’, “You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you’ll escape it one day, and how awesome it will be, and imagining the future keeps you going, but you never do it. You just use the future to escape the present.” I do not want to spend my entire life imagining the future and effectively missing out on life, escaping the present. So this weekend, my goal will be to try to stay as present as possible, to let go of expectations and hopes and fears, and just be. I hope that you all can take some time to just breathe and enjoy and clear your mind, whether that means meditating, working out, walking on the beach. Find something that makes you happy and takes you out of your head and DO IT. Live your life. You only get one. Happy Friday 🙂
